Don’t Fool With The Colonel Because Motherfucker Might Stop Your Heart

Many folks are hooked on the taste of grease.

Here I’m talking about the real artery clogging

type not the goop what gets shite done.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

“C’mon in the back” the old fellow drawls softly. “I got sumnin I think you’ll want ta try.”

Dude was wearing one of those light colored southern gentleman type getup’s and as I followed him through the winding, not overly clean corridors of the service station to his humble abode, a smell like the best crispy on the entire planet hit me like I will never forget.

Twice.

Whatever dude’s secret ingredients were, they were very attractive. Very, very stomach turningly attractive. Good was never discussed.

The lawyers would work all that shit out.

Tommy, check on the limo. Tell them to bring some suits, white boots and uh, a white Stetson.

Hurry Tommy, please!

Larry, bring mister over here pronto. Is his lawyer here yet?

As soon as his representation shows we need these release papers signed ASAP. Whose got the cash?

Tommy, make sure dude gets the thousand bucks as soon as he signs. And get a picture of him wearing our getup with the pen in his hand.

Boy, the old guy’s good. Really good. I almost hate to do this to him…

But… people gotta eat. So do we. So does dude.

Yep, this will kill a lot of birds with one signature… a shit-load pile of fucking birds…

Tommy?!

Where’s that fucking limo?!

 

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