We carry far too much guilt in our baggage.
Why we cart it along is a mystery to me but we do so questioning it is fair game.
I’m thinking that this phenomenon of “pretending we could do much better than we have” is just another way we portray a mistaken belief in human perfection. We are perfectly flawed and praise the powers that be for that because without it, we’d get pretty dang bored in a hurry.
“You’re so perfect” “No, you are!” “No, you are more perfect than me…” Yeah, right.
What were you…?
“Don’t even think about it!” was an admonition I heard many times over my life. Parents, teachers and most recently my wife are the people who constantly advised me to corral my thoughts. Something I found almost impossible, especially with every Tom, Dick and Harry telling me not to think of thinking.
So I would think about things and a lot of them I will admit likely weren’t that healthy for pondering but never-the-less, I did contemplate some of these concepts pretty thoroughly:
- I thought about my seventh grade teacher’s wonderfully inappropriate dress standards – we never married.
- I contemplated our discoveries in space and dreamed of being an astronaut – and then quit grade school to became an auto body repairman.
- Visions of me as a global hotel chain magnate flooded my mind – as I folded laundry, cleaned rooms and maintained our motel.
- The possibility of being a better father and husband haunted me constantly – I am who I am and am learning to accept it.
- I fantasize about standing on the throats of folks who wronged me on purpose – my life is invested in betterment for me and those I love.
- Sometimes I seriously want to quit the red tape, frustrating bureaucracy and needless bovine scat humans invent – but then I hunker down, push through or go around.
Thinking About Stuff is a Must. Doing is Maybe.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to start, quit or murderize someone.
But there is a big difference between thinking and doing. Why is it that we beat ourselves up over not doing something good and in the same thought we can pummel ourselves for not doing something bad? If we avoid doing something bad just by thinking about it – standing on someone’s neck, for example – then that pondering was a good thing.
Let’s toss the dirty underwear of guilty thinking out of our suitcases and make room for something else. Maybe a little jar of pick me up juice. That’s more exciting to contemplate.
Life is friggin great when we think about it properly.
I hope you feel the same way.
Thank you, friend.
Barry out.
Dale Carnegie and I never met but the man changed my life. First through his book How to Win Friends and Influence People and then through a series of personal courses. I’ve read every book this man wrote and the religion he started continues to this day. Its a religion you should consider joining…
PS. Dr. Wayne Dyer is one smart dude who got it together early. He and I don’t agree on everything but I sure as hail have to pay attention to what he says. Should you?
Hi Barry,
I really like your take on the concept of guilt. I laughed out loud at your fantasized thoughts.
Take care!
Katia
@Katia, Uh sorry, missus. Better late than never. Thanks.