Most folks have regrets.

They are able to imagine what is 

possible while contrasting what

actually IS and within their day-dream trigger a flood of real emotions.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

One bump could change everything.

One beep followed by another beep. Beep beep beep what the fuck?

Beep beep fucking beep, you gott a rightaway!

And yer done sleepin’.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks know when to stop.

They attempt and try and strive

until the cows come home and

if nothing has happened by then they give up and call it a day.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks want things to work out.

They resist yelling or being yelled at

and at every corner they control

their temper because once a

person loses that, now yer glimpsing their privates.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks have expectations.

They suffer to the degree

that reality don’t meet

up with ‘em though

which puts the ki-bosh on future expectations.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out. 

Most folks know about patterns.

They usually don’t realize though

that humans seek patterns in

everything & monkey see, monkey do.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Pareidolia

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pareidolia

Most folks don’t see things coming.

They’re watching the person in

front of them and the people

on either side and behind

them and being stuck

steadfast in traffic

while facing a green light is too, too much.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out. 

Most folks want to get along.

They get along with them whom

get along with them and if not,

they get along until they do.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Many folks die in the saddle.

They do what they can do

until they can’t do it no mo’.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks present themselves.

They clean, preen and sometimes

extreme themselves prior to

facing the world making 

most of what is visible to their naked eye an exaggeration.

Thank you, friend.

Most folks get rubbed.

They sometimes get rubbed

the wrong way and other

times to sleep but the rubbing, it don’t stop.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Many folks have seen video of a person being detained.

They are usually extremely happy to not be in the

Unfortunate Joe’s spot on accounta now they

got some splainin’ to do and if they ain’t

good at splainin’ they got some hurry

up and wait time ahead ‘o them.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks are striving to remain sane.

They attempt to hold shit together

even when the whole world tips

upside down and in turmoil

like this they can be so

convincingly wrong

that one is forced to dis believe ‘em.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Dis believe – verb; you’ve got a sneaking suspicion that someone is being hoodwinked and wondering if’n it might be you but for the meantime yer gonna go with it – dis believe, and hope & pray that everything doesn’t blow up like some terrible stank cake right in yer face.

Disbelieve – you have evidence which wipes any previous dis believing right the hail away.

Most folks don’t get surprised.

They never nearly jump outa their

skin or almost shit their pants

on account of always riding

with Brother Certainty.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Many folks know about collection agencies.

They ring bells and buzzers and maybe

would squeeze a person’s neck.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

A device needs to be created.

Just a simple headband with a spring loaded plastic hand

which can be activated to strike an offensive yapper by

entering a number which is plainly visible on the

back of their Yapslapper headband.

Employing this system, anyone acting like a moron 

would receive multiple yap-slaps from smart

phone admonishers who become aware

of stupid’s YapStop number.

Hear that clacking? Ats someone’s mind achangin’.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Don’t want to wear a Yapslapper? Everybody got yer number pal…

Most folks know about attention.

They understand it is limited and often

lacking because there ain’t enough to go around.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks have been shit scared.

They usually attempt to not show exactly

how much they are shit scared though

on account of that giving the scare

invoker more power to scare.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks know that bullets don’t think.

They understand that if a human aims a gun

at them, that human has the power to end

this dimension as they know it so if

they’re done with it, okay.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Look first.

Most folks have been in a hard spot.

They gathered up their resources and

steam and together they took their

swing at life and if it hit, good; if

it didn’t then they would pick

themselves up & dust that

person off and as before, continue.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks live only so long.

They usually have no choice over

how long that might be so guess

work in that direction would

most likely be redundant

and better left to professionals who specialize in such.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Many folks fall behind in payments.

They pull tooth and nail to get

their attachments to adhere

to a fifteen day cycle but

those less cycled could care less.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks are ex number of years old.

They don’t measure their life by trials,

errors or tribulations, they measure

it by earth spins which turns out to

be one of the worst measurement tools in existence.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks will wake up again.

They keep on keeping on and

before you know it they’ve

put in their time and its 

time to go even if they have no idea whose bags they’re carrying.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Production can be measured as well as time.

Better than.

Time cannot be multiplied.

Most folks know nada about margin.

They operate their lives one for one and

if not there’s a statement mailed every

month saying exactly how much of

what went where and what they

don’t take into account is how

close they are spending to that radiation called interest.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks fool themselves.

They say things are okay when

they’re not and they say they

don’t need any help when

they do but sooner or

later there comes a

time when load meets carrier.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Most folks enjoy respect.

They might even demand it

but demand away because

nobody got too much.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

My father was sometimes a painter in Virden, Manitoba.

Not the type of painter who could paint scenery, he painted buildings.

Mostly the insides of buildings.

One day I overheard him say he had been hired to repaint the inside of our town’s cafe which was the single spot in our area that had or could get anything a person could want.

- Nigger baby licorice. Check.

- Bubble Gum Cigars that looked like real cigars. Check.

- Little bit smaller than real cigarettes white candy / pink end cigs. Check.

Whatever You Want, You Can Have

No shit, that’s what George Chan, the owner of Virden Cafe said to me.

Look, he said, waiving his arm across the vast expanse of his behind the counter inventory.

Look, he said twice, the second time with a little more Chinese accent.

Anything you want while your father paints tonight. It’s yours… 

Mine, George said.

He’s standing right there. I’m not making this up…

I look him in the eye.

George returns my gaze, smiles and waves again for emphasis across an almost unimaginable empire.

See Here? he implored, arm around my shoulders to control a giggling desire to dive directly into his shelf upon shelf of mirrored confection heaven.

I am mister Chan I am. In this land I make the rules, understand?

I nodded my head in semi-shock and was about to ask for the key to his drink cooler when dad hollered at me to start help bring stuff in.

Anyfuckingthing I want! I mused, grabbing the lightest painting supplies in the truck.

George said anyfuckingthing I want. He waived his hand. 

Waived his hand like this world is YOURS!

All this… 

Wow…

So much to take in and some of it involving painting supplies. This brush, this tray, take the lids off those cans…

But jesus christ.

Did George really say what I think he said? (wish the old man woulda been there as a witness instead of being in such a panic to carry shit in)

Dad! Dad… Dad, George said I can have whatever I want while you were bringing stuff in.

I’ll have bacon and eggs! my uncle Glen hollered. Whose cooking?

We’re not starting with breakfast Glen! the old man growled, did you get those cans stirred?

Yeah, I’m doing that but George said…

Dammit Glen! Never mind the coffee! Start taping off those fixtures, the old man barked at his mostly volunteer brother-in-law as he headed back out to our old truck to bring in the ladders.

Not me. I was still mesmerized.

Anything you want… [all encompassing wave of hand]

Anything…

Eye yie yie. Anything…?

Well, jawbreakers last too long and shoestring chips are too salty.

Nibs are just twizzlers cut up and those black carmels ain’t really tar.

And ahl be damned if pickled eggs are only good in threes

Because the forth one goes back in the jar.

Took all night to figure out how to pop the bottle tops

and connect straws to drink the drinks securely trapped in the wells of the cold water cooler

but George waved at this heaven and said have all you want…

And thanks in part to George, I am.

I’m sampling, dampling and getting what I got.

And like my old friend I’m waving limitations free.

We wave a boat loada limitations free.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Many folks know about new and improved.

They understand that some users are so

head down arse up that wild horses

couldn’t tear them away from 

the program they’re running

while other playas are neck bent

on the what’s for dinner next big thing.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

They were five bros… five brothers.

Five fingers in the fist of a glove.

The rules they shook to came from no man,

No, these rules were sent from above.

They were so above this and of course above that.

Strolled in like the pile underfoot wasn’t theirs.

Or they’d never ever picked over well picked bones.

Hubris was the knock that stitched them hard with pride,

Ropers from the Fuck You Oh Kay Ranch.

And what they came for, it left with them.

Something else vacated too.

They just took everything they wanted, those guys.

They took everything they could get.

What held these bros fast was sinew and spit

And those logger head beatings from Dad.

They knew all along they would stick together,

No man can go it alone, dad said, someone needs to have your back.

The bros had each other’s back.