Archive for July, 2011

The Big Bad Wolf Called Boredom

Name two people who truly yearn to polish their consciousness. Why so few folks do is simple because life once stretched never provides the same rebound. Without constant straining it sags and soon stops snapping TO. And TO is where we’re heading, remember? Grab your partner & let’s go. Thank you, friend. Barry out. A […]

So What If It Was The Wrong Name, My Father Still Called For Moi.

I’m going to be out of commission for a couple of daze. Family thing and all that and as you have learned by now, this stuff is pretty hush hush with me. Until then, please make something up every day. Next week we’ll build on it. Thank you, friend. Barry out. The singing philosopher. Dude’s […]

Moving About In Hurry Up Today

Quick trips are the only ones allowed in the Land of Rushian. If you ain’t on an expeditious journey, chances are you’re holding up traffic. So go with the flow when there’s no other way. But don’t make a habit of it. Thank you, friend. Barry out. See hear.  

Attacks or A Tax?

Things are very confusing today. Maybe not just today and to me, it all seems to be happening on purpose. That’s quite likely how it has always been. Thank you, friend. Barry out. Angry people with vocal cords. Watch Out!

Before Air Bags and Crush Zones Impaired Driving Was No Big Deal

Stabbing folks is bad. Carrying a knife is not. Let’s think about driving under the influence the same way. We’re creating more victims than we save, by a long shot. Thank you, friend. Barry out.

Tell Anyone Who Doesn’t Like It They Can Kiss My Eigenwelt

Our lives have meaning. And meaning makers. But only one person can determine who and what all this encompasses and that substantial responsibility falls to lil’ ol’ US. If we so choose. Otherwise, our existence will be totally shaped by them and what they think. And if they happen to be confused at the same […]

When Evidence Abounds That We Might Be DORKS

Being tall or obese ain’t easy. Possessing evidence that a person might be fairly retarded ain’t wonderful, either. But chances are there’s plenty of proof. Because that’s who we are. Thank you, friend. Barry out. Harvey Danger – FlagPole Sitta I had visions, I was in them, I was looking into the mirror To see […]

Late FOR Work & Late TO Work R 2 Different Things

Taking your time is a good thing. Amazing how few folks do, though. They leave it to other people. Thank you, friend. Barry out. Yeah, I’m a loser so why don’t you kill me? (Like I’m killing you…) Beck – Loser In the time of chimpanzees I was a monkey Butane in my veins and […]

First They Came For Motor Oil. Pretty Soon Everyone Else Was Locked Up, Too.

Who gives a shite if our human rights are trampled? Just us and the folks we can make care about us is all. Because today the foxes are loose in the hen house and if we aren’t witnessing all hell breaking loose, I don’t know what you would call it. A friggin sixty-six year old […]

Too Many WoodCutters To Stop Burning Witches

Everything has a cost. But it also has a benefit. Just not always to the same folks. As in: Torching sorcerers is a good thing for… -Land owners where wood lives -WoodCutters and wood haulers -Wood storage shed builders -Burning stake and fire builders -Rope sellers and manufacturers -Local businesses on the big day -Da […]

Let’s Say YOU Put A Cinder Brick In A Bag In The Middle Of The Roadway

I was instantly filled with loathing and dread. Loathing for my own inability to imagine outcomes and dread because I now had a fair idea of those potential outcomes, none of which looked any good at all. At age nineteen I was waay past old enough to know better which only served to make the […]

Fine To Fight Humans But The Tiny Folks On Our Planet Got Us Over A Barrel

No Word In Ant For Retreat A three friggin hour talk about insecticides. That’s what myself and fellow industrial chemical salespersons were forced to sit through one hot un-air conditioned afternoon. Almost everyone in the overpaid group (except me of course 😎 ) was sleeping physically or mentally but after two hours when Dr. Doom […]

How To Extinguish OutRageous Characters

To non violently stop folks from straying from conformity: Damn them with doubt (silent and verbalized), rattle ’em with furtive glances / comments and frustrate them via limited inner ear access. That’ll be the end of that world right there. And a spot that should be marked. Like Billy The Kid made his. Thank you, […]

When Asking Is Tougher Than Doing

Name me one person who thinks that servitude and knowing how to type is wrong. We learned our ownselves. Didn’t we? Thank you, friend. Barry out.  

The Stank Of Our Elders

No Woofin GrandPa Cookies Those Little Friggin Genetics carry everything. We just feel like we’re carting our ancestral load. A person hates to think they might just be pack bearers in the whole scheme of things but as revelation unveils, it’s appearing more and more like that’s all we are. People To Be Continued. (PTBC) […]

Anxiety = Holding On To An Electric Fence

Shock therapy can be very helpful. There ain’t nothing quite like springing a choke inducing surprise on folks to alter their state of mind. The kind of conditioning jolts I’m talking about here are the ones that are short and sweet. Straight to the point as in I just got a hired / fired or […]

Someone Should Watch For Ideas or We’ll Never See ’em Coming

Should be two eyes per hole. At least. Smart thinking has a short shelf life. Sometimes less than an instant. If we aren’t paying attention and equipped with some kinda idea net, shite’s gonna sneak up on us and get away fast. I’m not even sure the same ideas come back around again but they […]

Outer Space – Right There Next To Our Epidermis

Dragonflies are fairly alien. Starfish are alien. Humans are no different. Out here it’s each alien for themselves. Unless us and the dragonflies work together. Thank you, friend. Barry out. How far out there do we have to go before shite’s strange? Not far…  

Want To Make A Radical Life Change? Clean Your Clock Closet Oftener. (CYCCO)

Anyone hesitating at a green traffic light will be reminded about time. Time. TIME. TIIIIMME. C’MON LETS GOOOOO!! Just ONE of the gods that rule us up the ying yang. I’m surprised that we don’t have reminders about this gawd everywhere we look. Oh, wait a minute…  Thank you, friend. Barry out. Like this little […]

Shoe Fly Shoe

Don’t throw your weight around. That’s what I taught my children. By not throwing mine around. Shoulda moved onto plan B with the extremities thing but I uh, didn’t think of it. Pity. Thank you, friend. Barry out. One of these daze we’ll be soul brothers. Lessons from the master:  

Cannons Need Fodder and Buses Need People Thrown Under Them

Ours is not to question why. Ours is but to do or die. Me thinks we’re accomplishing both. It’s clicky scary out there so look both ways before crossing the street. Thank you, friend. Barry out. High background radiation in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. We are fried, fried,  fried. Unlike these dudes, the shite I’m talking […]

“You’re Grounded Missy!” (To Give You A Hinty Hint Hint About Incarceration. Okay?)

Where did you get your parenting skills? Was it from a book or hopefully multiple month Heavy On The Pictures (HOTP) training course on how to make and grow humans? Nope, I bet your guidance was similar to mine – learn as you go from teachers and parents who couldn’t say penis and Playboy and […]

Why Don’t You and Your WheelBarrow Take A Hike

People for sure are resistant to change (RTC). And its a given they don’t take kindly to Kaizen. Even good adjustments are resisted and I can see why. Dang japanese not taking their own medicine… Thank you, friend. Barry out.

Only I Tell The Whole Truth. Everyone Else Is Fibbing Their Arses Off.

Some folks claim I’m full of shite. (FOS) I’m far from full, that much I can tell you. But no one –  not even me 😎 – tells the entire truth and not just because we don’t know what it is. There’s something else… Some unfortunates are just more prone to inventing reality by telling […]

Brown Noser Universities Confer The Crappiest Kind Of Corruption

Doctors won’t talk about each other. It’s professionally unethical for them to speak poorly of a comrade’s capabilities or judgement. Even if their comrade has none. Lawyers are tight lipped about their learned friends and hard pressed to spill any beans about fellow bar tenders unless we’re on the clock. Peace officers also quickly develop […]

When Loving Juice or Harboring Juice or Being Juice Is Deadly Wrong

The “right” thing is not always the best thing. And whether something is right or not is often determined by fairly insane folks. These queerdos might figure that so-in-so is a witch and with that misguided revelation begin a hunt for supposed evil that spans many destructive decades. It’s not unusual for The Powers That […]

Fuck Collaboration. Everybody Grab An Axe Handle & Let’s Tangle!

Imagine a vortex water spout to the moon. Life on earth would occur on Tuesdays and Fridays when the shite came back this way. But no, that ain’t how it works. The moon just influences the earth’s water, it don’t take it. Competition is the skeleton that needs to support a larger life force in […]

Calling All Earthlings

Creating division is a powerful strategy. Sun Tzu revealed lots about this over two thousand years ago in his missive about the art of military tactics. It starts out all simple like with folks calling everyone & everything a different name. Then two names. Soon three. And before you can say I’m a Spanish Minister […]

And Then This Invisible Dragon Started Biting People’s Heads Off!

It would be helpful if unobservable heat breathing lizards made noise. Or at the very least they could cast a distinctive odor that might alert potential snacks of their proximity to impending doom. Perhaps the big bellied beggars might leave ginormous footprints that could easily be tracked back to some dank cave where we might […]

Dying To Stay Alive

A single existence is not enough for some folks. Nope, the load they’re asked to carry is too big or hard to handle. Their journey is tough and tenuous at best. So in order to cope with the stress and strain of being alive, these people choose to die many times during a single stretch […]