My General Manager sobbed inconsolably.
Stuff bubbled from his nose and a foreign language dribbled from his mouth as he pawed an overturned office chair. It was a curious and fantastically decisive career event that is forever burned into my mind.
This professional, likable man was emotionally destroyed because he had just received a very public and cruel dressing down from the hotel’s owner – a dude who was proud to be known as an arrogant, mean spirited bully.
Twenty-four hours later during my exit interview I noticed something vaguely different about the GM. He was broken and broke in. As our eyes met for one last, brief moment, each of us understood that his decision to stay was providing license to another vicious and repugnant jerk. It was a sad day for mankind.
See Dick Jump, See Jane Run
Stories abound of tyrants manipulating intelligent, powerful people but few of these tales bother to mention that bossy blockheads require either governmental force or a private island environment to totally dominate anyone without their approval. And dictator endorsement can start off oh, so petty.
See if you recognize any of these smells coming from your company kitchen:
- Killer Glare, Buddy – your “superior” develops a look which can drop the temperature in any room and stop creativity or honest input in its tracks. Everyone including you automatically responds to this Pie Hole Shutting Hint and it works so well you might be doing it, too.
- I Don’t See Your Hand Up – herr commander requires authorization for everything and one more little rule isn’t a big deal so why complain? Soon everyone is providing free pee samples and eye prints.
- Sit Here Mr. Snide – cutting corporate comments keep everyone ducking. Folks who don’t duck get marks on them and you do not want to be a marked person around here.
- Lunatic Theater Gets Rave Reviews – mind bent work tourists wander around the biz-zoo trying not to kick tigers. The smart trippers give ol’ Tigg a friendly stroke and a little squeeze before slipping their coconut into his menacing mouth.
Pull PinHead’s Power
Horse whisperers purport to reclaim the tame spirits of wild animals and I suggest we do the very same for ourselves. Through contemplative analysis of our stressful circumstances we can divorce our responses and presence from those uncontrollable dramas we can do nothing about. And by now we all know that persecutors will not be changed so any alteration of outcomes must originate from us.
I wonder if any of these tormentor taming tunes strike a chord with you:
You.Me.Main-Street@Sundown – decide right now whether you are going to allow Black Bart’s behavior to stand and if not, what are you going to do about it? Recognizing voluntary participation reduces guilt and anxiety.
Same Song and Dance – consider whether this is unusual or normal activity for Captain Cross and ponder if you can alter the environment enough to influence this trend.
Who Can Stop The Rain – determine how much effort you will expend on creating the right environment because changing individual people is difficult to nigh impossible.
Five Aces Wins – is there a time limit on this game or is everybody in until Adolph gets tired?
Everyone has an oppressor lallygagging inside them and while most of us find it quite easy to control our need to dominate others, some unfortunates among us do not.
It is our responsibility to acknowledge that who they control and how they control is up to us. Oh, what a grand day it will be when the last jerk permit is handed out and we all begin to demand respect from one another.
Today might just be that day, right?
Thank you, friend.