Fear Who? ME?!

One hour ago I received a phone call from  John R, a Sheriff with The Saskatchewan Government.

sheriff gunslinger
Draw! if you have enough lead in your pencil…

Sheriff John is seriously interested in getting some payback for the creditors of my last business failure and he asked me some hard questions about how I plan to repay a boatload of money. The Good Sheriff wants to see justice done and I don’t blame him. If I were on the other end of this stick and someone owed me millions of dollars, I”d want Sir John on my side, too.

But he ain’t on my side. He’s agin me and that makes all the difference about how his call affected me.

Nothing here, c’mon folks, move on…

Regardless, Press On

I feel a wee bit sick right now because I don’t know what to do even though I’m quite aware of what I won’t be doing and that’s – nothing. Even though I’ve spent a couple of hours writing and rewriting this article, just having this blog allowed me to get into action right away and I feel much better for recording my thoughts about this incident.

So many times over the past few difficult months I have experienced this same wave of momentary hopelessness. I’m SCREWED! (no, I’m not) YES, I”m Screwed! (oh no I’m NOT!) Back and forth those two emotions fight while I’m writing this and they’ve been battling in my stomach for some time now.

But the more I think of this story and my effort at this very moment, the weaker the feeling of fear becomes while the notion that possibility exists all around me grows. As I write these words it expands even further.

Even Imaginary, You’re a Good Buddy

My final words to Sheriff John were to the effect that because of previous stupidity I am unable to declare bankruptcy and as a result will have to negotiate with my creditors. Unfortunately, all my cookie jars are empty at this time but I’ve filled many jars in the past, I can load these babies up, too.

friends giving each other gifts
Hey! Yours is bigger than mine!

Just to dispel any assumption that my life might be some kind of fairytale, the serious Sheriff wound up our conversation with menacing words which tossed some wimbly wobbly into my legs. “I’ll be back in touch with you real soon,” he growled, official like.

After hanging up the phone I paced nervously around my basement for a few minutes, getting all sick up and fed.  Thankfully, before I started taking out the different size nooses an idea struck me to write this note to you describing how I’m handling this all so brave like and such.

Just knowing you’re there, reading this, keeps me focused on positive action instead of those parasitic thoughts of futility.

I’m very fortunate to have you to write to.

Hopefully you’ll write back.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

Barry Williams http://barry-williams.com/blog

Much of what I write will be quite understandable to insane folks.

The rest will be, uh, less understandable...

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3Comments

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  1. 1
    Barry Williams

    A few days after Sheriff John called me a female Sheriff showed up at our door and when she flashed her badge my wife Kathy almost shit her pants!

    I wasn’t sleeping very well and this was 10 am, I didn’t want to be going to jail in my housecoat so I asked Kathy if she would ask the officer to wait while I took 30 seconds to throw on some clothes that might be worthy of the evening news if they didn’t get too close.

    Soon I was accepting some papers and after the initial shock of badge flashing everything went not too bad.

    It was just another creditor looking for $15,000. A small but never-the-less important stone on the scale.

  2. 2
    Barry Williams

    Yesterdday I received another letter from Sheriff John and in it he represents another company who is rightfully owed just under twenty thousand dollars.

    I forced myself to call Sheriff J this afternoon but thankfully he is tied up in some sort of jury case for the next few days.

    My wife and I agreed today during a walk that the best thing is to be transparent with the Sheriff as he has always been straight up with me.

    I plan to do just that in a letter to Sir J next week.

  3. 3
    Barry Williams

    We’ve gotten several more notices from the sheriff and when I phone in he is usually busy in court. Yeah, I bet sheriff John has lots to keep him busy, I just wish I wasn’t one of the things on his To Do list.

    I shore do think about you, sheriff John. Good night.

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