I Was Fortunate Indeed That My School Dumped Me Before I Could Vacate It.

“And because you think something is funny, everyone should laugh?!” the vice principle asked me incredulously.

“Well uh, yeah. That’s why I say it,” I naively replied. I genuinely thought I was being funny. The vice principle didn’t laugh.

Dude didn’t even crack a smile.

How, I found my mind drowning in the question, how could I find something so fucking hilarious while bald headed dude and those of similar hierarchical ilk found little to

none of my comedianitry even remotely amusing? If no one laughed

then I would have stopped long ago, I reminded myself, and yes

there had been laughter but only by the bravest souls and

even then breaking out from only the rankest improv

before dying a horrible death quarantined by the

stifling statism of stone faced room monitors.

Apparently they had grown weary of the

competition for attention in their class

rooms which meant I had just lost

round two in a life-long battle

for attention. Who next? I wondered.

Thank you, friend.

Barry out.

2 Responses to “I Was Fortunate Indeed That My School Dumped Me Before I Could Vacate It.”

  1. As I was “waiting to see the principle” in grade ten I remembered I had forgotten to take a twelve pack of beer out of the trunk of my car.

    Cold beer in the trunk of my car. In the school parking lot.

    Any way I sliced it, this meeting with management was going to wind up in my favor.

    Cold beer on the brain = hubris.

    [Reply]

  2. I’ve got attention deprivation.

    Jis lak elvis.

    [Reply]

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