Santa Hands Out PTSD

Here comes Santa Clause.

Here comes Santa Clause!

Man, old Santa’s lame!

See, Santa works for Hudson’s Bay.

Walmart and Macy’s, yay!

Santa fronts for MasterCard.

And Visa, he’s okay!

But Santa, he let Sears go down.

Let mom and pops go bust.

Believe in Santa, less in Satan.

See, Santa’s one of us!

Phasers On Ignore

He picks his nose and his goddamn farts!

Her mother’s a bitch.

His father, an arse.

She hits dat bingo.

Develops lingo that

Buddy says, Bitch!

Watch you’re goddam mouth!

Billy says duck!

But Buddy don’t look out.

Loose lips sinking ships that

Never did float.

Three Fitty Nine

Two eyes two ears two legs

Two sides of this one thing

You call yours and on

All fours that table turns

To where you’re not sitting.

This Land Is Not Your Land

Hello renter and

Occasional dissenter.

How does your garden grow?

Do you even know

What makes all this go?

No, you do not know.

Cause you’re only renting.

To Thine Own Self Be Rude

Bite your tongue.

Bite it hard.

Save yourself from you retard.

Be thee quiet.

Silent riot.

Wisdom’s on it’s way.

Mister Man Reflects, Can You?

He yelled at his kids.

Smacked ’em on the rump.

Warned them if they misbehave

There’d be another thumping.

He yelled too much and

He smacked too hard and

The desired result was so damn far

From what he got.

He never thought

He’d have a shot

At someday thinking it right.

You Would

Dude shuffles into your waiting room.

He’s hurting. Hurt bad.

You’d say, sir, take a number…

Ain’t ya heard we’re shorta staff?!

Lady says – this mistake’s yours.

‘Nen you get down on cloven hoved fours,

And CHARGE BITCH! you say,

Mistake? Ya made a big one!

Now you get some come up ants

And doesn’t ya let me catcha

Playin’ it’s right back atcha.

It ain’t, but if it ever was shit.

You’d bite your tongue the smallest bit.

And maybe eat a few of your words.


Don’t Run, Step Out Of Time.

A thousand goose stepping people.

All goose stepping as one.

One goose stepper stepping out

Of time…

Lookit that son-of-a-gun!

What is he thinking?!

Izzie inna daze?!

Doesn’t buddy understand

He’s wrecking the parade?

Oh… he’s with the next group?!


See The Outside From Insight

This wool is not a thread but it

Will wind up on a bed

As a mattress cover.

This thread is not a sheet but as

A hood, that thread will keep

A Grand Wizard’s name secret.

It’s just a thread…

That hood, it must stay hidden and

For that, they need trees willing

To give their slivers, to make a

Cabinet, to hide that hood.

That cabinet might need paint and

This time the better half ain’t

So hurt her hubby’s late and

She doesn’t hesitate

To make up her mind.

About the wool or about the thread.

Or about the cabinet which she said

Wouldn’t hide that horrid hood

Made out of thought.


Whom Thought It Was A Right Idea

You work too hard.

You drink too much.

You don’t do this

Or such and such.

You are an asshole.

And you don’t know it.

You squinting eyeballs

And making moaning.

They like, they hate you and

Even mama

Could not get you.

On their good books

With you-your looks,

Shoulda died in prison…


The Notches Of Love

Everytime her pie hole flapped

He would carve another notch.

And every notch was piled up

The last one was a gotcha!

It split their bark.

Turned their love light dark

It left a mark…

The marks joined up til

They formed some words

They were tough to make out

Then the main marker heard

Himself say

Not today.

No damn way.

There was no would left to notch.


Ya You Know Me Karma

He said there’s only so much internet.

And you’re taking up alot.

We replied the only internet we used

Is the internet we bought.

We own it.

It’s ours.

And if we want the internet

To travel in our kar…

We shall have the internet!

And we will drive it far!

Hello Revealer

You can’t act natural

Cause you’re not.

There’s a great big screen for fake

And you’re caught

In it, so you struggle.

You wiggle.

You point.

Ya, you don’t say here piggy,

But you oink.

They get it.

Your message.

They’re guessing

You’re address is:

Hurtsville. In Harmtown.

And you’re afraid

We’ll burn down

Your house, if we find it.

So you tear up behind you.

How you like the taste of scorched earth?



If You Must Eat Shit, Make It Tough.

You’ve got a damn good reason to complain

But you don’t.

You could whine and bitch about your pain

But you won’t.

Because that pain builds muscle.

Which is needed for any hustle

Through the hurtin’ shat storm called life.

Life ain’t always plight but

If you ain’t got it right

It spanks both day and night

Life’ll choke you out.

You can kick and shout.

Maybe flail about.

Cause if you ain’t made your muscle

It don’t matter how much you hustle.

Life will hurt you ’til you cry,

That’s no lie.


The Power Of No Thing

Underarms don’t stink because

The owners of them think

About today, who maybe drinks

From the dankest, hairy sink?

And then they drop a little color

In the water.

The table’s set for someone,

Perhaps you.

The clerk waits to serve someone,

Could be you.

The lottery spoiled someone.

The gunman shot at someone.

The shitstorm sullied someone.

Maybe you…


Only You Can Prevent Random

When this light flashed two times,

He touched that.

When that bar spun like this,

He tapped that.

Then a chime would sound and

He’d turn around and

There he found a young man

Had brought cashola.

It was time for holy moly!

Now he was in casholi!

But feed the lights he must.

Feed them ’til he goes bust.

If need be…

He followed Price’s Law.

Before him, so did his pa.

Both beggars would be in awe,

If they knew…




They Took The Smartest Ones First

They grabbed him by his Ipad.

Dashed his brains out on a website.

He’d sleep the sleep of the undead.

And he starts this big sleep tonight.

He got a rupture in his noggin.

He clapped when the others clapped.

He’d repeat way to go bud!

And he too, slapped their backs.

Flew that flag when they said drag

Your sorry ass on in here.

He’d be the first to appear.

Thought he traveled in the s’all clear.

Then his key didn’t work.

Tho’ he reefed like Herc.

He felt the jerk

That he really was…

Just because.

Hey, who dat at da door?



Never Not Being Fooled

World War One wasn’t world war one.

World War Two was War Two Thousand.

Human noses used to plough sand.

Sand that won’t even stay around

‘Til tomorrow.

So save that sorrow and

Look above the beach.

Its within your reach.

To see through their speech.

When they lay their wreaths

That they ain’t paid for.

Not what it seems.

Ignoring screams.

Nightmarish dreams.

Blood furrowed sand, nah…

That ain’t what they saw.

They saw fools at play.



Whoa Motherfucker! They Said To Me!

They always said whoa to me.

They said;

Whoa behind my back.

Said whoa,

Without us,

You’re facked.

Said we ain’t helpin’ none

You’re cracked.

Said go ahead jumpin’ to it,

You’re backed.

Said I ain’t leave no trace.

I ain’t need no base.

Said me? I am yo face!

Said you,

I can’t displace

These whispers.

If You Turn Sixty

You better watch your mouth

Cause shit heads south

In a heartbeat.

No retreat,

In defeat.

Cause you’ll meet

A monster.

It’s you sir.

Or mad dam.

You had ’em.

But what’s that?

You’ve had enough?

Now you talk tough or

Maybe, for you,

It’s nap time.



Once You Learn To Spot A Bag Pilot

See that thing

You can’t unsee.

Wherever you look,

There it be.

Occasionally wishing you

Did not see it.

That’d be freedom!

To not see them.

And not be one…

The flashes fade.

If you behave…

Keep your blinds drawn.

With what you sawn.

Sure don’t belong.

On your front lawn.

Better not project it.

Earth Is Flat. Life Is Round.

You can see that water is flat.

It’s flat. It’s flat. Water’s flat.

The earth is covered by water.

So that is enough of that.

Babies shit their pants.

So do old uncles and aunts.

And given just half a chance,

You will too.


The Devil’s In The Wee Tales

Mama, she loves me.

Wouldn’t hurt me none.

She tells me, your Papa,

Look what he has done.

He cursed you. He hit you.

Chased you with an axe.

And while you was outrunnin’ him

Mama was coverin’ tracks.

She set him up and

Popped him off.

Used him like an old rag cloth.

Wiped the floor with his weak dreams.

Fixed it all so he’d look mean.

Pulled his strings and Papa danced,

Never gave him half a chance

To be himself, revealed to us.

Mama spat and mama cussed.

He is a bad man.

You be glad then,

Mama’s here to save you…



Does Loser Give Off A Smell That Only Losers Can’t Smell?


He was one of us and

He held a high position.


High ranking.

You hadda have the

Right disposition.



Marijuana – Wild Mexican Tobacco!

Oh, we gonna have some big fun tonight!

Our cheeks will hurt.

We’ll double dessert.

People will stare.

We’ll try not to care.

‘Cause there baby we’re

High as fuck.



Today ain’t good and

Tamorry ain’t no better.

But what’s a couple changes to

An old go getter?

Go get this.

Go get that.

Hurry up man!

Get on back!

Changed our mind.

You change yours.

Get back down

On all fours.

You stand tall.

Only if you wobble.

No stead fast.

That breeds trouble.

Clicking fingers.

Come on the double.

Your plans gasket.

Their plans muddle.

Fuck You Tragedy And You Bastard Malevolence!

Jesus christ, he wanted to cry.

He needed shouting in his ears why, WHY?!

Fooled him bad, he didn’t even try

To forgive them.

Because it wasn’t them.

They were only men.

It would come again.

And if he wasn’t careful

Get more than his shareful.

Ain’t helpin’ be prayerful.

Do the old three sixty.

Watch his own damn back.




Aquired Intelligence Deficiency

You think you are smart.

But you’re not.

You think there’s more to get.

So it’s got


It’s illusion.

The confusion.

Of diffusion.

Gotcha losin’

Your mind.

There is no way out.

So don’t flop about.

Focus your clout.

That is the prize they are after.


They Have Swarm Intelligence And You Don’t

Your enemies are plotting your demise.

They are fed up with your poorly crafted lies.

Your legs had better work or your disguise

Of being crippled but

Victim hip though

Could come crashing to an end, doh!

Upsetting all your apple carts,

Would that be wise?

Find your third man and

Stick with him.

Visit Stockholm and

Kill your victim.

It’s within



The Glorious Sons – Sawed Off Shotgun




Give Placebo A Chance

Love won’t hardly touch lower back torture.

A friendly visit don’t do shit to fix that knee.

You just need to take a walk.

Maybe pep yourself a talk.

How bout knock that bullshit off…

Maybe stop complaining?

Put your faith in magic water.

The kind you bless, you really oughta –

Direct your power to some thing,

Then put it on.

Wear your belief or

Maybe drink it.

Or eat but you must think this

Blessed thing that you are doing

Is lifting curses and removing

All the evil thoughts you heap upon yourself.

Put your faith into this bottle.

Close the cap faith fully throttled

Toward relief and self rebuilding.

Thank you, Placebo.